I've had the time of my life

That's the movie that brought me to America.
A summer dream, hung up on music.
8 years later I love it even more.

More about photographers

How can you spot a real photographer?
Sure, by the camera as well..

...

It doesn’t matter where I will be in a month or a year from now.
I could be making snow angels in Russia, or breathing the fog in London. Maybe flirting in Paris, or admiring St. Petersburg.

but

I will remember the rain in New York. I’ve spent too many nights listening to it knocking on my window, keeping me company, telling me stories about others who’ve heard the rain as well.

I will remember the rain in New York. I’ve walked between umbrellas trying to catch the drops. If my clothes would soak – that proved everything. It proved that I was alive – I felt it with my skin.
I will remember the sun in New York. It was hitting me through the window in even perfect stripes.

My novel doesn’t end. It is next chapter.



perhaps... I'll even fall in love. again..

Nightmares

I was getting used to them.
But, today I was swimming with dolphins. They were saving me from the snake. I barely got away in the end.
The would let me touch them. One of them had wounds all over him - I was scared to touch him, but it sort of mirrored at me.

The meaning of dolphins in your dreams:
Dolphins represent friendliness, communal living, rescue, communication, and affection. They are water dwelling mammals and in our dreams they represent our willingness and ability to navigate through emotions. They represent positive messages from our unconscious minds. Dolphins could also represent a positive connection between our consciousness and to those parts of the psyche that is a mystery and largely unconscious.

Snake
Each dreamer must consider their own situation and all of the details of the dream. Sometimes snakes may be phallic symbols and other times they represent negativity in our lives that hampers our progress and constantly threatens us. In the long run the snake may be a positive symbol; it may represent difficulties that lead us to the center of personality and result in feelings of completeness.

This is amazing. How, and who comes up with these definitions and meanings?

Vagabond

I abandon everything again. The hopes, the relationships, the things and places I love.
But, fuck - I've lived, I've tried, I beleived, I fought.
Should we embrace our destiny?
Yes - we should, because otherwise it will bend you over and ... well, the best case scenario kick you in the ass.

Hemorrhoid

i hate moving.

NYC - CEK

Christmas

zuzu's petals

for an Angel who deserves wings.

communicate

hipsters

autoportrait

Yangfuck

Union sq, 2009

Fail

my wants a camera

A bum in the USA hat, howling.
Union sq. 2009

29th Birthday Present

On my 29th B-day I am making a present to myself. I am going home.
'nuf with the bullshit.
;O)

IT'S JUST AWESOme!

Big deal - somebody robbed you on the corner,
Big deal - your wife is telling you a lie,
Big deal - you feel as if you are a goner...
Be thankful, man, that you are still alive!

So what if you are tortured by sarcoma?
So what if you were not let in at five?
So what if you boozed off into a coma?
Be thankful, man, that you are still alive!

Don’t care if your buddy kicked the bucket,
Don’t care if your head would crack and rive,
Don’t care if they stripped you like a sucker...
Be thankful, man, that you are still alive!

Relax, although your skin is sores and scratches,
Relax, when only troubles boom and thrive,
Relax, when being carried on a stretcher...
Be thankful, man, that you are still alive!
-V.Vysotsky

Yes, and strong!

PS: ok, that's enough therapy for tonight...

And this is why I am so talented

I am smart

my old theory, which I found out, confirmed by Hemingway:

So if you are miserable, don't worry, most of us genius people are.

A short

Progress

I talk to people daily.
I get out, pretty much every day.
I've started looking for a job.
I smile more.
I even laugh.
I watch not just suicidal movies.
I became vegan.
I drink less, pretty much don't.
I got back to my friends that I haven't spoken to in two years.
I respond to my e-mails within two-three days.

I am getting all better.

:)
I don't know what I have been expecting, using a cliche phrase - there is no "miracle" tomorrow. It's not like you can get up in the morning and feel a sun-burn at the places where the sun don't shine.
No, it takes a lot of painful getting up from your knees and being knocked back down.

But I see tiny bits of light.

Go West

You will never be happy.
You'll never find love or have a family, a home with a tv-remote and a dog. Nor will you have a friend that would stand by, when the shit hits the fan.
You can, however, get a job.
And then, you can get a paycheck.
That shitty money could get you a bottle Wiskey. You'll use it to stop the bleeding.

Like a real cowboy.

The Most Beautiful Thing I've Seen

that was done by human

Letters of Van Gogh Fully Published on the I-net

http://vangoghletters.org/vg/

A Portrait of a Boy With a Portrait of a Girl

He lived alone with his parents, two older brothers, baby sister and a dog. He also had two hamsters, best friend, and a fort.
He was 5. Or maybe a little older, maybe somewhere between 5 and a half and thirty.
He liked two types of people; everybody and nobody.
More than anything in the world he loved his secrets. That’s why he became a dentist. He wanted to be a Robespierre when he grew up, but that was a secret. And he loved his secrets.
He also loved a girl. He drew her when he was 7. She had long hair, two eyes, no nose, and lips. She had no boobs either. It was a portrait. Later, he wished he didn’t take so much space on the paper drawing her big face.
Some nights he would look at the portrait and think to himself: -”How ridiculous, she does not have a nose. What was I thinking? Everyone has a nose. Two ears, two eyes, and 32 perfectly placed teeth.” We only have 20 when we are young, he though, they are white pretty teeth, soft and sensitive, and they don’t last that long. Completely useless.
That’s how he spent his time. He entertained himself with deeply philosophical view at his work, and a portrait of girl without a nose, or even boobs. He, too, considered it useless.
He’ve met a lot women that looked exactly like the portrait. His assistant, in fact, looked alike, but not quite. She did have a nose, and a big one.
He could have flushed the portrait into the toilet, after all – but he loved his secrets. He cherished and nurtured them more then anything. More than himself.
He, secretly, was a noble man. The only thing that could have gave him away were his lips that uncontrollably drew into a smirk when people noticed nice things about him. That was no bother, however, as he was not aware of that betrayal act his lips played on him.

Who needs feelings when we have science?
Who gives a shit about love, when there is lust?
Let's all get together and celebrate power over delicacy.

Why choose between the friendship and the truth, when we all know thousands of brilliant excuses?

Why believe in people when nobody does?

This is how bold bear looks like

not so cool, right?!

So much to say. So little worth it.

words always fail you when it's something important. Right?!









I wish I could disappear one time so that I don't have to disappear ever agin. ever.

we all learn sometime

A master plan

I'm trying to say something positive, think something nice, do something good. But all that is coming out of me are random clogs of bile.

I'm tired and poisoned.

Life cheated me on that hope of wonder, which my parents have put into me, while I was cluless. And now I deal with it.

I will get back at life for it. I will plan my revenge. I will throw my pitty self into it. And close my eyes. And never think about it again, and never look even at it.
And maybe then... it will come crawling to me, standing right next and surround me. And when it does, I'll say: "allright life, you might stay - but never fuck with me again."

The way we live

Everyone. And I mean everyone, every day is searching for some rediculous IT in futility,
leaving a trace of abandoned MAYBEs behind.

Thanks

The gray people embracing apathy,
The office clones,
The self-indulgent bastards,
Bitches, Whores, Fuckers,
I am thanking you for making exile as alluring as it seems.

Sleeping Betty

deceiving

If you want to save a princess you better make sure beforehand, that it is a princess, and not a dragon.
yep

Mad

How do you know if you are mad?
You don't.
Why in the world do doctors bother asking if someone is suicidal. It's a double negative trick. If person REALLY is suicidal s/he would already be dead, or would not EVER admit it. Because suicidal means that you want to die. And if you DO actually want to die, you are not going to tell anyone, because then - there is a slight chance that you would not follow through.
God, everyone is so fucking stupid. but me. =]
of course.

Beatles For Impared

CODEy Shwartzenegger

I will always
mean what
i
say.
so just
Take this
obvious statement as my
best communication effort.
yours, j

Episode

80smthng hrs no sleep. More to continu....

e e eeeee ee e e e

HB

I <3 Remi, you will 2

&

That's why they are so damn expensive

Sweeet

Enjoy the silence

Words like violence
Break the silence
Come crashing in
Into my little world
Painful to me
Pierce right through me
Cant you understand
Oh my little girl

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

Vows are spoken
To be broken
Feelings are intense
Words are trivial
Pleasures remain
So does the pain
Words are meaningless
And forgettable

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

Enjoy the silence

Poster Redux

Answer

I finally get it!

A circus. The host comes out and calls the next performance:
-Ladies and Gentelmen, and now... long waited for... Talking Horse!
Drums. The ray of light on the ceiling. The horse is lifted high above, to the very top. The drums stop, and the drapes rip open.
The horse hits the floor with all its weight.
Silence.
In a minute it starts to move, trying to get up and says: "When am I fucking gonna die..."



That's it.
That's me bloggin.

Song2

If you stay real close, and listen to my chest,
You will hear hollow sounds - that is madness in my skull, playing Ping Pong.

Awakening

Try to wake up!

You will hit despair.
You will see misery, ride madness.
You will be hiding in the darkest corners of depression.
-
All that, for a spoonful of bullshit, called truth – that you can't even swallow.

Ah!

And just so you know

JuliaTheTerminatorGreatReturn (take15)

Poetry

I have discovered poe Poetry
And now that I discovered thee
My life is now to it devoted
completely. Because Poetry completes me.
I know it deeply in my heart
Nothing will keep us apart.
Poetry is my oasis among a thousand islands of phistashio trees, that are so beautiful when in full bloom, in spring time.


And roses are red, and violets are blue.


And friendship is my salvation
because together we stand,
and alone we do not - we fall.
Alone we fall into the darknes...............
Death!

-jl

Where Are The Poets?!

A digital painting by Tiago Hoisel:

A portrait of America, I assume....

A scene from the MOSCOW ON THE HUDSON:
The Russian and the Cuban are passing by a night club with a bunch of punks on the background:

"R:This is a goddamn insane country.
They were so young, and their eyes were cold like animals.
In Russia, I knew who the enemy was.
Here, it's too confusing.

C:You're overreacting. I always heard
that Russians overdid things.

R:Is this liberty? If it is, it's false liberty.
Where are the poets?

C:What do you want, a perfect place to live?
There's no such thing.

R:Police said, even if they catch them,
they go free.

C:They're juveniles.
They get away with a lot of crap."

Mr. Hoisel is definetly very talented to paint a portrait of a whole country like that. And just in case this introspective work is not very convincing, I would like to attach another one of his work.

I believe that he should definetly take a different look on both of these works.

Yarr!


PS: I would, however, like to ask him exacetly what the fuck does he knows about this country. And thank him for sharing his talent, of course.

:)

Epilogue

We all are going to die.
Sooner or later.
Yes, and you too. You too, are going to die.
And, in fact, as you are reading this right now your time is ticking...

tic-toc-tic-toc-tic-toc!



PS:
HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!

Nasty Brat

I'm just too far gone to find the littlest hope inside to keep going.
Or even to pretend to keep going just for the sake of people, who show in the most gentle way, that they care.
I am sorry.

I can't even pretend for my mother who has been talking to a corpse of her daughter once a month or so... We would hang on the phone. She - in one part of the world. And me - in the other. I can only imagine how it would feel to see a part of you, your kid slowly fade away. And she would try to find the best words, the most amazing stories, she would put on oscar-worthy masks, tricks of all sorts to call off her child, who is slowly dying inside.
And both of us are HELPLESS.
And I am trully sorry.

Synechdoche, NY

"Everything is more complicated than you think.
You only see the 10th of what is true
And there are a million of little strings attached
to Every.Choice.You.Make.
You can DESTROY your life EVERY time you choose

But, maybe, you would not know it for many, many years
And you may never trace it to it's source
You only get one chance to play it out
Just try and figure out your own divorce

And they say there is no fate!
But there is!
It's what you create...
And even though the world goes on for ..ions and ..ions
But you are only here for a fraction of a fraction of a second,
Most of your time you spend being dead of not yet born
But while alive, we wait in vain
Waisting years for a phone call, or a letter, or a look
From something or someone to come along
AND IT NEVER COMES
or it seems to but it doesn't really.

And so you spend your time in vague regret
or vaguer hope that something good will come along.
Something to make you feel connected,
something to make you feel whole,
something to make you feel loved.

And the truth is I feel so angry,
and the truth is I feel so fucking sad,
and the truth is I've felt SO FUCK_ING HURT, for so fucking long!

and for just as long I've been pretending I'm OK, just to get along, just for.... I don't know why....... maybe because no one wants to hear about my misery, because they have their own.

Well, fuck everybody.

Amen."
-Charlie Kaufman

On The Day When Godot Never Comes

Chances are that you are more likely to spot me in a subway catching rats for lunch, before you are going to hear me ask for food.
I DON'T ASK FOR HELP.

Right. I don't ask for help. I beg for it.

A month before moving to NY...
I drive myself to the ER. Self-diagnosis: something is wrong with me.
I mellow out in the patient's waiting room. The noise of a TV on the background, people burried into themselves. I'm waiting to be taken care of. Soon or not, but definatly certain. I disappear in a bliss.
-Lachimova!
-Yep, I'm here.
I'm smiling at the dawn of dead, lips squized. I follow the nurse with a walk of a saint. Silently, I sit down and gently place my head on my chest.

A brief conversation with a doctor. Half awake I explain that SOMETHING is seriously wrong with me. A couple hours later with all the tests possible she sees me again and declairs: You are perfectly healthy.
I cry. I nearly roll myself on the floor.
-But, but, something IS wrong with me!!! Please, you have to HELP ME! Help me! Hey you are the doctor! I try to remember the Hippocratic Oath. I cry.
- ARE you a doctor?! I convulsevly search for identification signs on her white robe.
- How long were you a doctor?!
She patinetly looks at me. Not arguing and explains that in the ER there are a lot of patients who need URGENT care.
And as she leaves the room, I throw the last bait: But what should I do?!
She turns around ans sais:
-There is nothing wrong with you. You are physically healthy. I recommend you talk to somebody. Call you doctor.
...smart woman.

(somehow, I never read into "You are physically healthy. Call your doctor." Neither anybody else would dare to point it out to me.)

I return to my car. Lay my driver seat back. And watch the rain hit the windshield.
Case closed.

There will be another attempt that would consist of three sessions 45 minutes long, spent with a fierce attempt to humiliate my shrink.


Can one help herself?

Can someone help?

How do I convince myself that life is worth of getting out bed?


A book on shelf that I have not touched, but, it jumps at me every time I pass by: "I can't go on, I will go on." Samuel Beckett
I don't want to read it. What if I find something that would make things clear to me? What do I do then?!

my self-evaluations.

There are moments - like right now, when I understand myself and feel that I can be honest.
And I just want to track my thoughts. Commit to them.
And maybe figure out my bad patterns, somehow.

I forgot when was the last time I went to sleep.
I don't fall asleep. I pass out.
I either drink myself to sleep, watch movies, read, think or exhoust myself in some other way.

I remember the times when I enjoyed it. To be able to lay down and appreciate it.

I remember the first time I felt numb. The first time I was FINE. I picture myself standing on the kitchen popping something into my mouth casually, telling my mom and my relatives how my father nearly choked me, while drinking himself mad. I went there to pick up the books and he felt betrayed that I wouldn't stay with him.
A conflict? Sure. I felt bad that betrayed him. And I hated him. I didn't know how to deal with the situation. What is the right thing to feel. So might just avoid it all together. And so I was, showing the blue marks on my neck to my relatives, while those nearly fall of the chairs. Oh, no - I'm fine don't worry. I understand everything, auntie! And btw, this lipstick looks great on you. Yep - gotta go study, two days before the finals.

There are a lot of fucked up things that happen to us. But it's not that that screws us over - it's how we deal with it.
Sure I could have blamed my problems and cling onto the things that happened to me. But I want to change. I don't want to live unhappy.

There are slight attempts of me trying to be a normal person. Like, again, going to bed. I'd make a bed, eat a fat-free yogurt before bed, take a bath before, make it smell nice. Lay down. ......... Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. I tell myself. Then realize that I am concentrating so hard that my face looks like that of some guy from china-town trying to perform seppuku with a chop-stick. Oh no, I think. I'll have wrinkles! NEED TO RELAX. Relax. Relax. Relax. ...... This will be happening for a while, until I say fuck it all - wrinkles, health, samurais, sleep. And I open my lap-top and get to my movies.

Sometimes I forget how to breathe. Literally. Suddenly, I would be thinking about something, while cooking and would feel the need to sit down, or feeling the kitchen starting to spin. And realize that I wasn't breathing. There are times when I was with my ex, we'd be laying. I'd be pretending to be falling asleep, going deep into my thoughts, as he would say: Julia, why did you stop breathing? Ah?! What?! You are awake?! - I'll say. Did you have a bad dream?! Oh. You didn't sleep yet.. I see.. I must have dozed off... While being proud that I didn't spill out of my mouth: AH?! WHAT?! WHO IS HERE?!

alright, I bored now. So off to my movies... which I am yet to talk about soon...

Hypocrisy?

Hypocrisy is the act of pretending to have beliefs, opinions, qualities that one does not actually have.

Hypocrisy is thus a kind of lie. Hypocrisy may come from a desire to hide from others actual motives or feelings.

Nothing is more unjust, however common, than to charge with hypocrisy him that expresses zeal for those virtues which he neglects to practice; since he may be sincerely convinced of the advantages of conquering his passions, without having yet obtained the victory, as a man may be confident of the advantages of a voyage, or a journey, without having courage or industry to undertake it, and may honestly recommend to others, those attempts which he neglects himself.

-from wiki

an endless mystery of why people do what they do

or don't - what they should...

Harmless

Woe to those who commit suicide...
to those who destroy themselves!

No one is more miserable.

By damning God and life,
they damn themselves.

Timeless their consuming hunger,
their rejection of forgiveness.


They curse the God
who beckons them.


They wish annihilation on Him

and on all His creation.

They thirst after death

and the void.

-from Jesus of Montreal

I have pushed away even the furthest people in my life.

set the most clever traps for myself.
Sometimes I feel this pain that I can't really identify. And all i know is that it hurts like a motherfucker.

There are two emotions in my vocabulary:
I'm fine.
I'm mad.
Something wrong with the picture?

When somebody is reaching out to me it hurts. Seeing people being nice to me makes me cry. Secretly of course. Because I'M FINE!

I have to work through some major issues. I want to be with people who have not given up on me (which is going to be my psycho-analytical project after I am done with myself, since there IS something wrong with them if they haven't yet).

so off I am to start working through my shit.

Bukowski

As much as I nod to this poem,
some self-preservation instinct tells me that there is nothing noble about pain.

'bama

The Flame of Olympic Torch

I watch. I observe. I ache.
I grow.
I grow up.
I grow old.
I watch. I observe. I ache.

Life repeats itself for centuries.

And as the new generation is trying to catch a mad genius desease, desparate, manic, mad, angry - the old generation is too desparate not to loose that desease, also manic, mad, angry.

Painful experience of being alive, craving religion, art - the proof of life.

Something's wrong here. A link is missing. A logical connection between generations.

And from a distance they watch the youngesters in agony, catching themselves on fire. They wont come close because this new younger faces are too loud, too mouthy, too angry, too happy then they remember themselves back then.

The youth is drowning, incapable to capture their own existance.

The elders become so tragically mellodramatic that Greek Gods themselves could have borrowed ideas to write their myths and pass them on for centures to come.

Confused, I scratch my head tuning into the lyrics trying to capture the message from Gods of Rock-n-Roll. Devoted, I listen to Kurt Cobain refusing to believe that he wrote those songs while being high on drugs.

I'm writing, wondering if Rock was a result of epiphany or extasy.

Symbols

Symbolism - is the use of symbols to represent things such as ideas and emotions.
The right sign for crusification, for example, should have been this:


As a hint of hope. as tho God spoke to us and said: "Hang in there, people."


but even gods make mistakes....
;)

Wellcome,

-"We are all mad here."

?

Amelie

i can't believe this - the whole movie is availible on youtube in HIGH DEFINITION.


Plot
Amélie Poulain grows up isolated from other children due to a belief that she suffers from a form of hypertension (increased heartbeat during physical contact).

Left to amuse herself, Amélie develops an unusually active imagination.

As a young woman, Amélie is a waitress in a small Montmartre café. The café is staffed and frequented by a gang of eccentrics.

Life for Amélie is simple; having spurned romantic relationships following a few failed efforts, she has devoted herself to simple pleasures.


....and then the rest is cinématique!
:)

On meaning of life

Do not ever listen if anyone tells you to look for answers from within.
I am talking from experience. Multiple experience.
Maybe it's just me - but anytime I try to do that - I end up laying flat on my back for days, waiting to be crusified.
Then I get better and happy like a drunk pig for a while, running around studying and questioning the universe.....until I come across this formidable answer, probably written by some psycho-twisted old man with a long beard, a finger raised to the sky, and a snake-like smile.
LOOK FROM WITHIN.
And then I do it all over again.
I mean... is that what they call a circle of life?

Why can't I just find the answer, write it down on the cieling of my bedroom so that I could wake up happy and content every day, and go to bed satisfied. Why???!

...wait.. don't answer..

Colours

This tulip grew up to be different just to make you smile!



and don't let me start on what it's like to be different...
;-)

I am seeing...

no - not the light this time.
A pattern.

more about poets

An Eagle took a long way when he decided to learn from the Crow.


Stupid fucking white men...

and, btw, I don't always mean what I say...

i want to die

that is what's really on my mind.




i know I'll get over it.
always did.


anyone wants to talk about depression? :)

more about dreams...

It appears I am not a butterfly, nor a philospher.

Revenge :)

I am done with deeper meanings
as they were done with me.

The Last Temptation of Christ

Death, life, ressurection
Prophets, salvation
Faith

I am at the bottom of it all with broken bones.

THE SEARCHERS

A year-long journey of a Civil War veteran.
A quest to find his kin (a grown up niece that married a Scar and became a melting pot of absorbed culture).






The tagline says it:
Best movie ever made...

...oh yeah, it's in VistaVision

I'm tired, lonely, and bitter.
I'm exhousted and cynical.
I have no ambition left - instead the minimum of primitive desires.


FIN.

Heart Attack

Strange....

Never Over Anymore

PUNK IS NOT DEAD!

It just passed out.








Do you know the warm progress
under the stars?
Do you know we exist?
Have you forgotten the keys
to the kingdom
Have you been borne yet
& are you alive?
Let's reinvent the gods, all teh myths
of the ages
Celebrate symbols from deep elder forests
[Have you forgotten the lessons
of the ancient war]
We need great golden copulations
The fathers are cackling in trees
of the forest
Our mother is dead in the sea
Do you know we are being led to
slaughters by placid admirals
& that fat slow generals are getting
obscene on young blood
Do you know we are ruled by T.V.
The moon is dry blood beast
Guerrilla bands are rolling numbers
in the next block of green vine
amassing for warfare on innocent
herdsman who are just dying
O great creator of being
grant us one more hour to
perform our art
& perfect our lives
The moths & atheists are doubly divine
& dying
We live, we die
& death not ends it
Journey we more into the
Nightmare
Cling to life
Our passion'd flower
Cling to Cunts & cocks
of despair
We got our final vision
by clap
Columbus groin got
filled w/green death
(I touched her thigh
& death smiled)
We have assembled inside this ancient
& insane theatre
To propagate our lust for life
& flee the swarming wisdom
of the streets
The barns are stormed
The windows kept
& only one of all the rest
To dance & save us
W/the divine mockery
of words
Music inflames temperament
(When the true King's murderers
are allowed to roam free
a 1000 Magicians arise in the land)
Where are the feasts
we are promised
Where is the wine
The New Wine
(dying on the vine)
resident mockery
give us an hour for magic
We of the purple glove
We of the starling flight
& velvet hour
We of arabic pleasures's breed
We of sundome & the night
Give us creed
To believe
A nightr of lust
Give us trust in
The Night
Give of color
hundred hues
a rich mandala
for me & for you
& for your silky
pillowed house
a head, wisdom
& a bed
Troubled decree
Resident mockery
has claimed thee
We used to believe
in the good old days
We still receive
In little ways
The things of Kindness
& unsporting brow
Forget & allow



..whoever was the first to say that Poets - are the Prophets of the time was right.

WHAT DREAMS MAY COME

He followed her to hell and saved her.
A beautiful story.
A fabel...

The way I prefer to handle things

Foot in the mouth award

I could probably take a chance at that one...
anywhoo:
winners


my favorite:
Former United States Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld for comments in a press briefing. "Reports that say that something hasn't happened are always interesting to me, because as we know, there are known knowns; there are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns — the ones we don't know we don't know."

now, man, this is some deep shit right here. yeah, literally.



PS: I miss Bush...

About Benefits of Atheism

Man Killed In Church

Gunther Link, a devout Catholic, prayed to be saved after he was trapped in a lift – but was killed when he went to church to give thanks and the stone altar fell on him.

He must have gotten the hell anoyed out of God.

Depression is over!

sounds easy, right!
and feels that way too!

! (ok, one more exlamation sign - just for the heck of it)

farewell - is a small death

trapped

it is so hard to give up on life
but it is even harder

I cant escape - I have to be released

A Last Letter to My Beloved...

My love,

There is only one single question I have for you:
WTF?

4eva yours,
-j

Purple Love

Mila

leter b!

from the comments on youtube:
English: Is this man drunk?
Dutch: He is Russian.



and, wtf - worst cover ever?!
I thought, it was very soulful!! Yeay for the seaman!
The dude shall not bother with the attempt to understand this subtance called Russian Soul. Nobody should. it's dangerourse.

you are looking for heaven

among the people

on earth.

:(

For you...all.

My map with traces, treasures - gone
The moon and sun got stuck - dawn.
Friends, lovers, parents - spies
Blindfolded, throbbing me - advice.

Let people think; she is just lost soul
...
My i-pod shuffelled
no drugs - no rock'n'roll